Question:This past Sunday I attempted the Seattle marathon. This was my first marathon and in fact my first ever running race. My goal was to run the 26.2 miles in 3 hours and 45 minutes. Here in slightly censored format is my long and self indulgent race report.






Answer:

Prologue: My alarm wakes my up at 6:30, I do what I do every morning and shut it off and go back to sleep until 7:30. At 7:30 I get up, eat a banana and a dried fruit bar and slug back a glass of water. I have a nice hot shower to warm up the muscles. I get out of the shower feeling energized and ready to go. I am staying with my friend John Franke (pron. Franky) who conveniently lives 2 blocks from the start of the race near the base of the Space Needle. Franke walks me down there and I run around looking for safety pins to attach my race number with. None to be found, but a volunteer tells me to shove it in my pocket since the chip that I am wearing around my ankle will take care of the official scoring.

Mile 1: After standing around for a while, the race starts at 8:15. I start mid packish in the crowd of 2325. It takes a full minute just to cross the start line. The first mile is relatively easy through downtown Seattle. It's hard to pass anyone at this point anyway. I get stuck behind a couple of chubby loud mouths who think it's funny to yell "Are we there yet ?" and "How much further" every 5-10 seconds. I am wearing my heart rate monitor. Bad decision. For some reason it is reading 173 which is insanely high. I get a little freaked out but then I decide to ignore it. Additonaly the chest strap keeps slipping off and falling down to my waist. This *never* happens. I keep hiking it back up and it keeps falling back down. Finally I decide to let it fall to my waist and ... ignore it. I'm also having problems with my gel flask that I bought the day before. The gel flask holds this chocolate flavored energy spooge and comes with a little holster that holds the flask and clips onto my shorts. It is bouncing around like crazy and bugging the crap out of me. Then it falls off. I turn around and pick it up. I will have to hold it in my hand the rest of the race.

Mile 2: At the first mile marker, I check my watch and my pace band (piece of paper I wear on my wrist that has all the times I need to make for each mile to finish in 3:45). I'm already 1 minute off pace. I'm ok with this since I wanted to start slow anyway. I am treating the first 4 miles as a warm up.

Mile 3: The first water station. Nobody is stopping for water. Figuring that there will be a big line up at the next station I decide to stop for a swig. We pass Safeco field and head up the I-90 ramp. This is a slight incline and all I can see ahead of me is runners. I look back, same thing.

Mile 4-5: Not much to report here, except that I am a minute and a half off pace and decide that now is the time to start catching up. I skip the water station and the bathrooms and pass a lot of people. I can feel a blister starting to form on my right foot. I decide to ignore it.

Mile 6: We hit the I-90 bridge heading out to Mercer Island. I begin to feel some chafing in my nether regions. This *never* happens and I don't understand why it is happening now especially only 6 miles into the race. I decide to ignore it. The leaders are coming back towards me the other way. The pack of 3 looks like 1 contender and 2 pretenders. We cheer them on.

Mile 7-8: I'm really hitting stride now as we head back the way we came along the I-90 bridge. I feel like a million dollars (CAN). I see the portly wannabe comedians and they are struggling, already about 2 miles behind me. I resist the urge to yell "How much farther ?".

Flashback to 6:30 Saturday evening eating dinner. Frankes girlfriend Secil has made me a special order pasta and chicken breast dinner. Franke: Eat some more pasta, you gotta run tomorrow. Me: I don't wanna eat too much because then I'll have to Deuce. Franke: What's a Deuce ? Me: Number 2.

Mile 9: The Deuce is on. I pass a row of Honey Buckets (porta toilets). There is a loooong line up and I'm not big on Honey Buckets so I decide to hold my cards as we head south on Lake Washington boulevard.

Mile 10-11: Still feeling pretty good I have taken to counting steps 1-2-1-2-1-2-1-2-1 ...... There is a rolling roadblock of people particicpating in the half marthon walk. They are 3 wide on the road (and these ladies were w-i-d-e). This pissed me off. Serenity now !! The male leader is heading back towards us now, it is not one of the 3 from before. This time he cheers us on. I am impressed and I hope he wins the race (I think he did).

Mile 12: Heading into Seward park, I check my split. I am now one minute ahead of pace. I think I have time to play the Deuce. Everything works out pretty well as we run right by a public bathroom in the park, no honey bucket for me !! There is only one person in front of me in the toilet line up. I play the Deuce and throw down an Ace as well.

Mile 13: Wow, does that feel better. I feel like a great weight has been lifted off my kidneys. Somehow I lost 5 minutes in the bathroom, but I'm back now and feeling like 2 million dollars (USD).

Mile 13.1 I do a little jig in my head as I cross the halfway marker. I have to make up 3 1/2 minutes in the second half to hit my goal.

Mile 14-17 I am now heading north back up Lake Washington Boulevard. There is a breezy head wind that is making my fingers very cold. I am wearing shorts and a polypro shirt, which is fine, just my fingers are cold. It's about 8 degrees Celsius out (45F for you yanks). The cooler temperature has made it practically impossible to get anything out of my gel flask so I haven't really had any source of energy since before the race. Either something is going wrong with my brain or all the mile markers are messed up because I keep missing them. I think a bit of both. I get very confused and I think I have lost 5 minutes and then that I have gained 5 minutes. I decide to ignore it and keep running. I am passing a lot of people.

Mile 18-20 Somewhere along the way I became lackadaisical, forgot I was running in a race, and actually slowed down for a few minutes. A woman in her mid 40s passes me and is running strong. This is the first time I have been passed since my bathroom break, and she inspires me and breaks me out of my slumber. I sit on her tail for the next little while. We run past some spectators cranking Billy Joel from a ghetto blaster and this gets me pumped (Billy Joel ? who woulda thunk it). I run right beside her for a few hundred meters with Billy pumping through my veins, but she seems to be slowing. I offer words of encouragement and tell her that she is pacing me. This is the only time I actually interacted with any of the other runners, I think I'm a bit of a snob. She looks tired so I continue on without her up the first of many hills to come. We head into a wooded area on an old windy road that is very green and scenic. People that started too fast are dropping like flies.

Mile 21: I pass the 20th mile marker, and start up the 21st mile. Alledgedly this is when "The Wall" is supposed to hit. The genius who designed the course has decided to put the biggest hill right here. It is very steep. I attack it hard. It feels great to pass people on this hill. It is a guilty pleasure as I know some of them are not feeling good at all. However some cheer me on as I work my way up. I'm having a lot of trouble reading both my pace band and my watch, but I think I'm only about 45 seconds off pace.

Mile 22: The same hill continues up East Madison although it is not as steep now. The numbness that I had earler attributed to coldness has now spread to include my whole hand. Then it moves up to my elbows, then shoulders and eventually to my head. I feel halucinogenic, like I'm in a David Lynch movie. I expect little backwards speaking midgets to jump out of the bushes at any moment with their pet llamas in tow. I am a little worried and think I may have hit the wall, but I decide to keep up the pace and if I fall over I fall over. I am also worried because I haven't been able to get much sustenance during the race. I am weary of the gatorade because I have never trained with it and my energy spooge is not working because of the stupid flask. I hit the top of the hill and the downhill starts, but it is steep and hurts more than the uphill. Thankfully the wierd numbness subsides and is now just in my hands and forearms, what a relief.

Mile 23-24 We head through the Arboretum (fancy word for tree park). Starting to feel good again as it is a more gradual downhill and I figure I'm on the home stretch.

Mile 25 I pass my old place from when I lived in Seattle 2 years ago. I had told myself earlier that this was the spot were I would start givin 'er. I change my mind.

Mile 26 The Space Needle is in sight, I head into downtown still passing people. My running style is becoming very labored. I can't hold good form, but I can still hold pace.

Much better than my first marathon, which was my first race, too. I now think that was a mistake. You should run some shorter races before your next Marathon. It's fun and it helps establishing a pre-race-routine. Part of that should be to have a light breakfast about three hours before the start. Yes, that seems awfully early, but it should help you visiting the toilet before the race.

Another hint. Apply some vaseline to the "nether regions", and that should prevent chafing.

will definitley be doing some 10ks in the next while. My plan is to work on improving speed until mid February and then start piling on the distance until my next one in early May.

I'm very new to running, but I thoroughly enjoyed your report. Thanks for the read!

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